Wrong-Side Syndrome

I’m cranky. (Larry David)

Is there anything better than waking up after a great night of sleep? You’re warm and comfortable in your bed. Birds are chirping lightly in the tree outside your bedroom window, the sun is shining brightly (though not in your eyes), and all is right in this crazy world. You get up; get ready for the day with a long, luxurious shower; enjoy a fragrant, cheesy omelet and a steaming cup of artisan coffee; and you leave for the day. Your day is just going so well. Few days are as lovely as this one.

And then I come along. I didn’t sleep well because I was up late working on a project. I slept in, didn’t have time for breakfast or a shower, and stepped in my neighbor’s dog’s poop as I walked to my car only to realize that I would need to stop for gas. My day sucks. It’s just not going to be a good one.

You run into me at school/work and I scowl at your chipper attitude and sunny outlook. I snap at your small talk and will provide no more than single-syllable answers for all of your questions. I make you feel uncomfortable. You feel bad for feeling good. Slowly, you feel like maybe you are tired; maybe you didn’t sleep quite so well. Maybe that omelet wasn’t quite so good. Maybe you realize you missed a spot while shaving.

The scenario you have just witnessed is an example of what I like to call “Wrong-Side Syndrome”.

Instead of a long lecture, I have this to say. Don’t let your crappy day ruin someone else’s good one.

Stay classy,

Kassieboo

“Please”

“Which way did they go, Peeves?” Filch was saying. “Quick, tell me.”
“Say ‘please.'”
“Don’t mess with me, Peeves, now where did they go?”
“Shan’t say nothing if you don’t say please,” said Peeves in his annoying singsong voice.
“All right- PLEASE.”
“NOTHING! Ha haaa! Told you I wouldn’t say nothing if you didn’t say please! Ha ha! Haaaaaa!” And they heard the sound of Peeves whooshing away and Filch cursing in rage.”  (JK Rowling, Harry Potter and The Sorcerer’s Stone)

“Please”

I’d like to keep this short because it should be just a refresher for everybody.

When you ask somebody to do something for you (whether he or she is paid to do that thing or not), you say “please”.

End of story.

That’s all, folks.

Image

But really, this is supposed to be a natural inclination. I was raised to say please when I asked for things or ordered food or needed something done for me. In fact, if I didn’t say it, my family (including my older brothers) would tell me I needed to say “the magic words” or they just wouldn’t do it until I remembered to say please. It wasn’t a matter of only doing this in public. I had to do it at home, too. Saying please, for me, is a natural part of asking a question or ordering foods or services. I’m not suggesting that I’m perfect, but I certainly know that you say please!

I find it incredibly rude when I am out with a few friends who don’t say please and thank you to their servers in restaurants or even the person from whom they are buying pants!

To me, not saying please suggests that it is your right to expect something to be done; that you believe you are better than the person serving you. And that is never true. Every single person is equal, from the Queen of England to your server at McDonalds. And each person deserves the same level of respect. That level of respect includes saying please.

You’ll notice that I didn’t include much about “thank you” in this post, but that is because I reblogged this post by Greg Morton in the last month and I think that he does a good job of explaining its use.

Stay tuned for more!

Stay classy,

Kassieboo

Work Cited

The image is 100% my own (shotty) work.

The Harry Potter quotation was taken from this site because I didn’t think to look for it in my own copy of the novel. The passage belongs to JK Rowling, I am just quoting it.

Changing the World with a Simple “Thank You”

I have yet to write about the use of “Thank You”, but this post from a fellow blogger sums it up perfectly!

Morton Design Works

thank you

I’m a big believer in good manners.

I’m not sure who invented the concept, though I can say with some certainty it probably wasn’t cave men, whacking each other over the head with the bones of a snaggletoothed lizard or something like that.  No, I’m not sure who invented the concept, but that person is a silent genius.  The amount of expression and respect one can give in the smallest of gestures is nearly unfathomable.  Some of greatest hits of good manners include;

Holding the door

Saying “God bless you” to a sneeze

Picking up a dropped item for someone

Walking diligently across the street when a car allows you to cross

These are some of my favorites, anyway.  But the mother of all good manners is an adjunct reaction to all of these already good deeds, and it almost serves as an after-thought.  It is the pinnacle of politeness…

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Tardiness to Lecture

Better never than late. (George Bernard Shaw)

Maybe it’s being in my fourth year of university or maybe it’s something new, but lately I’ve noticed that people who are late seem to care less and less. I don’t know about you, but I work really hard at being on time for class. I leave early, anticipate difficulties like trains or accidents, and generally try to take responsibility for my own education. I have, once or twice, gotten caught be a chatty classmate or had car trouble and been late. It happens. I understand. I really, really do.

Here’s the difference between me and other late people I have observed recently: I try to make myself invisible. I don’t want to be rude and interrupt a lecture which has already gotten into the swing of things. I quietly slip into an aisle seat or, if none are available, I stand at the back until lecture is done or there is a break. This, to me, is common courtesy.

Lately, however, this has not been what I’ve seen others doing. Just last week I witnessed a young woman clunk into the classroom in high heel shoes (much too high for walking long distances at any kind of a normal pace). She carried her large purse and huge coffee beverage across the hall, up a few steps, and then proceeded to climb over about four or five people (hitting them in the head with her purse on the way by) before she settled in in the center of the room. I was appalled! Not only was she about a half hour late, she was so obvious about it! I would have thought it were funny if it weren’t so blatantly rude and selfish. There were tons of aisle seats and spots in the back, but she still decided to sit in her presumably-usual seat.

I’m sorry to go on about this, but it’s just so frustrating to me!

To all the late people out there:

Please recognize that you are not the only person in the class and that you are distracting those of us who worked to get there on time. It’s really not that difficult. Understand that you need to make a few sacrifices when you’re late; that’s all. Maybe if you have to stand for an entire lecture and realize how hard it is to take notes without a desk, you won’t be late next time.

Okay, I’m done!

Have a great week and stay classy,

Kassieboo

Doors

Okay! So this is my very first post on Classy and True and I think that it would be best to start out with a very simple topic: Doors.

Imagine this: You’re walking across the parking lot at the grocery store when it suddenly starts to rain violently! You hurry toward the door, tripping slightly as your Toms (or whatever brand name of shoes you’re wearing) get caught on a crack. You don’t fall, but you’re getting wetter and wetter by the minute. On the bright side, you’re about ten steps away from the glorious dryness that is Safeway. You’ve got this. You’re good to go. You’re going to buy some organic almond milk, a bag of bananas, a loaf of gluten-free bread (I guess you’re trying to be healthy or whatever), and-okay, that chocolate bar on special right beside the till-and get the heck out of there. This is your plan. It is a good plan. But then you get to the door and a man checking Facebook on his phone is ahead of you. He pushes the door open for himself and you walk up behind him, assuming that a functioning member of society understands the convention of holding the door for the person behind him, and begin to walk through the door way when BAM!! The plexy glass and steel battering ram called a door slams against your arm and face. The man didn’t hold the door for you. Your entire trip is ruined by poor door etiquette.

When I walk through a door in a public place, I (a) wait to see if somebody else is waiting to walk out and let them go first, (b) hold an arm out behind me just in case anybody is coming through. It would be mean to let the door close on somebody. I feel like these are pretty simple concepts, but apparently they aren’t. I don’t know what it is with people today; maybe we’re in a constant state of late or maybe we’re over stimulated and have too much on our minds. Or maybe we just don’t care about each other. This last point seems to be the answer when a door closes on me or I run to catch the door after someone and they just let it close. I end up thinking to myself, maybe people are just jerks.

I’d like to believe that people aren’t jerks and that they are simply preoccupied with the growing amounts of information with which we are faced every day. This is easier to stomach.

There is also the possibility that maybe parents and society, in general, don’t teach manners anymore. My own parents worked to set a good example for my siblings and me and I’d like to think that I’m a polite and respectful person because of it.

I don’t let doors hit people and I thank those who do the same for me. Ultimately, it comes down to treating others as we want to be treated ourselves. If I don’t hold the door for somebody who has his or her arms full, then maybe somebody won’t hold the door for me when it’s pouring rain and I’ve got a stack of books in my arms.

Maybe that’s the way to inspire door etiquette: think of yourself and what you want and then project that onto your behaviour around other people. While this concept feels selfish, it also makes sense in a world where a lot of doors are opening and closing on a lot of innocent people.

Before I end this surely-stimulating discussion of door etiquette, I guess that it is important to mention an exception for door holding. Don’t hold a door for somebody who is too far away. If they are still halfway across the parking lot or street, then holding the door for them puts the burden on them to hurry up to catch your politeness. That’s crazy. It’s extremely awkward when I’m walking toward a building at school and I look ahead of me (like fifty meters) and somebody is holding the door and looking at me expectantly. I usually end up trotting to catch up and get through the door, but it makes both the holder and the enter-er feel awkward and sometimes annoyed. Not cool.

So next time you are on your phone watching Vine videos of cats as you walk through a doorway, take a glance over your shoulder and check to see if someone is behind you because it sucks to be hit in the face with a closing door.

Thanks for reading. I’ll be back soon!

Kassieboo